Let's get personal: Where have I been?
Why hello... again!
Let's start by stating the obvious: IT’S BEEN A WHILE.
So.. where have I been?
This has been the longest blogging break I’ve ever taken in the history of this blog’s existence.
Yep this post you're reading right now is my first blog post since June. I haven't blog for FOUR months. Well technically 3 months because I went to USA for 1 month. Anyways, I didn’t throw my computer off a cliff and quit in some dramatic fashion. No, I just quietly walked away and eventually forgot I even had a blog. It wasn’t intentional (which you'll know why soon) but the longer I was away from it, the more it became normal. Stepping away was an eye opener, in a good way. I felt like an outsider in the blogging world even more so when I realised that bloggers I considered to be blogging friends weren’t even following me anymore!
If you’ve followed my blogging journey, you know that I’ve been blogging since about 2011 and that I’ve had approximately 4 different blogs over this time-span. This one though (started at late 2014), I felt like I could give something back to all who've been supporting me for the past years. Be that as it may, I woke up one morning and felt uninspired and frustrated by it. And that made me sad.
I've came to the conclusion that I would push myself way too hard when it came to reaching a certain standard with my content, which in turn took away from the enjoyment I got out of blogging. I looked back at some of my older 2015 posts, and I would laugh at the sloppy writing and not-centre-quality photos. But at the same time, I realised that back then, I was getting a lot more joy out of writing posts than I have done recently. I used to write purely for fun, rather than constantly trying to one-up my own work. Perhaps I am alone in this, but I think that if you have been blogging for a while, you might be able to relate to what I'm describing.
So yea, back to my last post which was in June, I went away to USA at late of June and I came back home at end of July. Back to full time working in August. On top of full time working life, I was also deeply involved with temple related activities - one for helping alongside with the 'young adult division' and the other, helping out for a 'be kind be vego' campaign. So yep, 5 days of full time working, and weekend dedicated to temple. My energy was drained to the max. Next, my creativity decided to finally give up. And then the motivation.
I’ve had a serious case of the “blogging blues”. I’ve been comparing myself to others, my writing, my photography, myself as a person. I’ve wanted to get back in to regularly posting for so long but every post I write just doesn’t seem good enough. I hate every photo I take. My posts are too short, too long, too chatty. There’s not enough photos, too many photos. Blogging has been a massive part of my life, and even when I’m not posting consistently, behind the scenes I’m spending my days planning ideas and taking photos for future content.
My feelings then - I thought I lost the love for blogging. I felt like I was writing because I felt I needed to, I was accepting products and collaborations for the sake of it. I was forcing myself to write when the creativity didn’t flow. I forgot why I started. I didn’t start for the freebies, the views, the followers. I wrote for me. Because I enjoyed writing. I think I’ve been spending so much time worrying about what other people will like, what will make me look good, what will make me stand out, how to gain followers, how to improve my writing style, my photos, my content, that I’d forgotten what’s important. I had forgotten why I started.
Last 2 months, I've been re-lapsing to another low point in my life, I was struggling just to get through each day. But the quote above got me through those rough days. I don't believe I have reached the "best" yet, but I know it is there and with hard work and perseverance it will come. Many of our friends and family may be struggling through some rough times right now and I hope they can remember "the best is yet to come". I feel like a lot of us are going through busy and stressful times at the moment. I certainly was and still am. For two months till now I have felt overwhelmed with my everyday life. I have been uninspired and unmotivated to create new content for my blog.
This has been my every day mantra because right now I still feel a little deflated. Slowly recovering from all the overwhelmingness that has been happening in my life. I keep telling myself to just "believe in yourself" because in the end only I can change for the things I don't like and achieve my goals. No one is going to do that for me.
.
.
.
This is really where I want to leave this post now. It’s getting long and I’m running blank now. Maybe I’ll add more, maybe I won’t: not sure yet.
To those of you who stuck around and encouraged me through this time, thank you! You guys are the best.
PS. And also to thank all of your support that I've reached my first milestone on my instagram, I've open up a giveaway :) Feel free to enter here: ENTER MY GIVEAWAY
Here’s to returning to the blogosphere again!
I shall see you in my next post, very soon (I hope!)!
Step one: write the first post I’ve written in months.
Check.
Love,
Melon xoxo
Let's start by stating the obvious: IT’S BEEN A WHILE.
So.. where have I been?
This has been the longest blogging break I’ve ever taken in the history of this blog’s existence.
Yep this post you're reading right now is my first blog post since June. I haven't blog for FOUR months. Well technically 3 months because I went to USA for 1 month. Anyways, I didn’t throw my computer off a cliff and quit in some dramatic fashion. No, I just quietly walked away and eventually forgot I even had a blog. It wasn’t intentional (which you'll know why soon) but the longer I was away from it, the more it became normal. Stepping away was an eye opener, in a good way. I felt like an outsider in the blogging world even more so when I realised that bloggers I considered to be blogging friends weren’t even following me anymore!
If you’ve followed my blogging journey, you know that I’ve been blogging since about 2011 and that I’ve had approximately 4 different blogs over this time-span. This one though (started at late 2014), I felt like I could give something back to all who've been supporting me for the past years. Be that as it may, I woke up one morning and felt uninspired and frustrated by it. And that made me sad.
I've came to the conclusion that I would push myself way too hard when it came to reaching a certain standard with my content, which in turn took away from the enjoyment I got out of blogging. I looked back at some of my older 2015 posts, and I would laugh at the sloppy writing and not-centre-quality photos. But at the same time, I realised that back then, I was getting a lot more joy out of writing posts than I have done recently. I used to write purely for fun, rather than constantly trying to one-up my own work. Perhaps I am alone in this, but I think that if you have been blogging for a while, you might be able to relate to what I'm describing.
So yea, back to my last post which was in June, I went away to USA at late of June and I came back home at end of July. Back to full time working in August. On top of full time working life, I was also deeply involved with temple related activities - one for helping alongside with the 'young adult division' and the other, helping out for a 'be kind be vego' campaign. So yep, 5 days of full time working, and weekend dedicated to temple. My energy was drained to the max. Next, my creativity decided to finally give up. And then the motivation.
I’ve had a serious case of the “blogging blues”. I’ve been comparing myself to others, my writing, my photography, myself as a person. I’ve wanted to get back in to regularly posting for so long but every post I write just doesn’t seem good enough. I hate every photo I take. My posts are too short, too long, too chatty. There’s not enough photos, too many photos. Blogging has been a massive part of my life, and even when I’m not posting consistently, behind the scenes I’m spending my days planning ideas and taking photos for future content.
My feelings then - I thought I lost the love for blogging. I felt like I was writing because I felt I needed to, I was accepting products and collaborations for the sake of it. I was forcing myself to write when the creativity didn’t flow. I forgot why I started. I didn’t start for the freebies, the views, the followers. I wrote for me. Because I enjoyed writing. I think I’ve been spending so much time worrying about what other people will like, what will make me look good, what will make me stand out, how to gain followers, how to improve my writing style, my photos, my content, that I’d forgotten what’s important. I had forgotten why I started.
800 words later I think I’ve managed to say what I wanted to say in this post. I’ve rambled a lot when all I really wanted to say is that I’m back. I’m going to take my blog back to something I enjoy spending my evenings doing. And I hope you start enjoying reading it again too.
I’ve already written way more than I intended *oops* but before I end, here are some quotes/mantras I've been living by -
- "The best is yet to come"
Last 2 months, I've been re-lapsing to another low point in my life, I was struggling just to get through each day. But the quote above got me through those rough days. I don't believe I have reached the "best" yet, but I know it is there and with hard work and perseverance it will come. Many of our friends and family may be struggling through some rough times right now and I hope they can remember "the best is yet to come". I feel like a lot of us are going through busy and stressful times at the moment. I certainly was and still am. For two months till now I have felt overwhelmed with my everyday life. I have been uninspired and unmotivated to create new content for my blog.
- And I know that it is so important to put myself first and take a break if I need to. The world will not come crashing down if I don’t post something on Instagram or can’t deliver a blog post that I am proud of.
- "Believe in yourself"
This has been my every day mantra because right now I still feel a little deflated. Slowly recovering from all the overwhelmingness that has been happening in my life. I keep telling myself to just "believe in yourself" because in the end only I can change for the things I don't like and achieve my goals. No one is going to do that for me.
.
.
.
This is really where I want to leave this post now. It’s getting long and I’m running blank now. Maybe I’ll add more, maybe I won’t: not sure yet.
To those of you who stuck around and encouraged me through this time, thank you! You guys are the best.
PS. And also to thank all of your support that I've reached my first milestone on my instagram, I've open up a giveaway :) Feel free to enter here: ENTER MY GIVEAWAY
Here’s to returning to the blogosphere again!
I shall see you in my next post, very soon (I hope!)!
Step one: write the first post I’ve written in months.
Check.
Love,
Melon xoxo
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